Description
This is a short sketch based around the preparations for the annual Christingle Service which pokes fun at EC regulations and political correctness whilst making the point that Jesus offered his love and friendship to all.
Extract:
Cast: Steward, Official
Sound of knocking on the door
Steward: Hello - can I help you
Official: Good afternoon, I'm from the Department for the Regulation of Midwinter Celebratory Occasions.
I'm here to bring you up to date on the latest EC regulations appertaining to any proposed or planned activities of the worshipful variety.
Steward: Midwinter Celebratory Occasions. Do you mean Christmas?
Official: Oh dear we've not got off to a very good start have we - I've only been her a minute and you've already started bringing religion into it.
Steward: Well of course I have - this is a church, we're Christian and we're planning our Christmas services!
Official: That's as maybe but you will still have to abide by the latest directives and I'm here to make sure you don't contravene any regulations. So if we can get started by looking at your planned order of service please.
Steward: Well I was just going over the Christingle Service on Christmas Eve. We thought we would start by singing 'While Shepherds Watched'
Official: That carol has now been renamed 'While Livestock Management Operatives Observed their Charges' - there are a few other changes as well - I'll let you have a copy of the approved words. Please proceed.
Steward: Oh OK. Well we will then have a reading about the birth of Jesus. You know how they had to travel to Bethlehem on a Donkey.
Official: I'm sorry you will have to change that - you see the EC Government's are very concerned about live animal exports.
Steward: They weren't exporting the Donkey - they were riding it! Anyway the story goes on to tell about how the baby was born in the stable.
Official: So this Mary and Joseph were homeless, economic asylum seekers - highly irregular.
Steward: No, No. They weren't homeless it's just that there wasn't any room for them at the Inn.
Official: Well then what happens?
continues...